O-R-E-O

O-R-E-O...  ...Nabisco... <Ding>

I love Oreos. LOVE. LOVE. LOVE. I love them enough to rarely buy them. Lest I take on the general shape of an Oreo...

As previously stated, I am a traditionalist. I like regular 'ol Oreos. Double Stuf on occasion. Special occasion. Paired with Bud Light, now that I am an adult (a legal definition; I didn't say "grown up"). I used to love a good dipping in milk. But, now I have a much more refined palate. Clearly.

I twist and separate. Then eat. Methodical.

But, here's the thing. Oreos are chocolate and cream. Cream that is one step removed from Crisco. Nothing more. Nothing less. That's the beauty. The simplicity.

Blasphemy.

So, imagine my surprise when I saw rows and rows, stacks and stacks of different kinds of Oreos. The grocery store was littered with 'Oreos'.

It was horrifying. I may never recover.

Apple Pie? Peanut Butter? Birthday Cake? Heads or Tails? Red Velvet? Cinnamon Bun?

Wait, what?

Cinnamon Bun?

WTAF?

Those aren't Oreos.

They're cookies. I mean, I guess they are cookies... I don't really know. They are cake and pie... I think. I am unclear on the definition of a head or tail... 



But, Oreos they are not.

Oreos are chocolate and 'cream'.

Period.

Of course they are free...