Woman's Work

I don't write political posts. Not my deal. And, this isn't a political post. This is a why this is a big fucking deal post. The votes are in. The voting is over. I, and the rest of America am exhausted. But, this is a big deal. My team lost. We don't have the first woman president. This time. The fact that it will be more than 240 years and 45 men to get there is disheartening. It's upsetting that the women before us had to fight and were literally attacked and jailed fighting for the right for us as women to even vote just 94 years ago. That some people thought the best way to get their candidate in this year was to repeal the very amendment that our grandmothers fought for.

I'm heart broken. It's not that I wanted Hillary Clinton because she was a woman. I felt and still feel that she was the best candidate. She also happens to be a woman. We've come so far and yet, not far at all.

I'm not a man hater. I don't want anything special. I want crazy things like equality and respect.

This is a big fucking deal for me, the nine year old who wanted to play the drums in the band and was told 'drums are for boys'.

This is for me the 10 year old who couldn't play soccer on the co-ed team any more because 'they were too rough'. Instead of encouraging me to push back or fight harder, I just wasn't signed up again.

This is for me the 15 year old who's first job was at Dairy Queen where girls were required to wear long skirts and panty hose. At Dairy Queen. Where I watched the much younger perennially pregnant wife of the owner work her ass off while being submissive to him. I learned a lot from them. Probably not the lesson they were hoping for.

This is for me working at a grocery store and being told that 'women just don't make good managers'.

This is for me who worked for two years with a man who never looked me in they eyes as he was constantly focused on my chest. When I went to my male manager to complain, I was told that there wasn't really anything he could do and that 'he's been like that for years'.

I've been sexually harassed, sexually abused and minimized. I've been told to dress appropriately so that I am not raped. I've listened as people who I love and admire say things like 'she was asking for it' or 'well, look how she was dressed'. Because when women are attacked, it's somehow our fault.

This is for me who went to a hardware store, explained what I was building and what I needed to buy and was asked who was helping me then told that it was a big tool 'for a girl to handle'.

This is for me who was asked just the other day if I needed to check in with my husband before signing off on a repair. (Um, there isn't a husband...)

This is for me, who was guided by someone well meaning to learn all the 'business machines' I could in school because being a secretary 'is a good job'. I'm sure it is, I'll go ahead and manage an engineering team at one of the largest corporations in the world. In a male dominated profession. Where I actually work on a team where I am the only woman. And can hold my own.

This is for me and all the girls, ladies and women out there who are pushing for equality, speaking up, and breaking through glass ceilings. This is for the parents raising children to be whatever they want. That there is no such thing as 'girl jobs' or 'boy jobs' that you can be anything you want - even the President of the United States. Someday. We'll get there someday.

I'll keep speaking up, even though I'm often referred to as a bitch or that I get feedback for being blunt or too intense.

I'll take it as a compliment when I'm told I have 'big balls'.

My response is usually 'I know. Brass ones.'

But, really, I'm happy with my va-jayjay. It's far more powerful.